I want to marry a boy whom i love but i don't have any chance to go out and marry him officially or marry him through other marriage formalities... Like, we both have high sexual urges and we want to fulfill it at a halal way without any third witness... Will our marriage be acceptable if we tell ourselves that we are husband and wife by promising to Allah, and also the groom will gift paid money as delmohor? if its not then please tell me a way out
2 Answers
No. Having two witnesses is either a pillar of Nikah, or a condition for it, or is obligatory according to the madhabs. Similarly having the permission of the guardian of the wife is either a pillar or a condition of Nikah according to the majority opinion. In the absence of both of them the Nikah will not be valid.
لا نكاح إلا بولي وشاهدي عدل، وما كان من نكاح على غير ذلك، فهو باطل
There is no marriage except with a guardian and two witnesses of good character. And the Nikah which is without them is invalid.
— Saheeh Ibn Hibban , Sunan al-Kubra Bayhaqi, Saheeh al-Jaami‘
Bismi Allah Ar Rahman Ar Rahim.
In the name of God, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful.
All Perfect Praise be to Almighty God,
and prayers and peace be upon the Messenger of Allah and his family and companions,
Having said that,
Peace be upon those who follow guidance
It is not permissible for a woman to marry herself without a guardian, because it is saheeh that our Messenger (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) has said: "There is no marriage without a guardian" Narrated by Abu Dawood (2085). Classed as saheeh by al-Albaani in Irwa 'al-Ghaleel (1839)
as he also said (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) : "Any Woman was married without the permission of her guardian, then her marriage is (void or invalid), her marriage is (void or invalid), her marriage is (void or invalid)" Narrated by Ahmad (24417), Abu Dawood (2083), and Tirmidhi (1102), and classed as saheeh by al-Albaani in Saheeh Abi Dawood,
and most of the scholars agree that there is no marriage without the brides guardian permission and 2 adult witnesses at least, otherwise you are in the position of committing Zina (Adultery) and that's a big problem with serious consequences.
My Sister the best way out is to confront your family and make a real marriage (even without ceremony or formal party or any other form of society conventional events, you see the most important thing is the blessing of God and that only what matters as he will judge us based on what we do in this life.
and if you were scared of their reactions or anything else, pray Istikhara prayer (assuming you do pray the 5 fardh prayer cuz if u don't that's a greater big danger you are facing), when you prays Istikhara you make your intention to fix your mistake fearing and desiring in Allah repent, rewarding and blessing upon you
God Almighty said :
("Know that Allah knows what is in your hearts, so beware of Him; and know that Allah is all-forgiving, all-forbearing. ")(Surat Al-Baqarah:235)
I also advise you to read Quran on regular basis, as it helps healing our souls guiding us towards better lives,
and God knows best.