I'm 19 years old and I love my cousin. We love each other and want to marry. My parents have died. But his parents are late in participating in our nikah.

We met in alone. But we didn't have any sexual relationship. We just hold hands.

Is it wrong to meet a boy or girl before marriage and hold hands and talk to each other on the phone?

3 Answers 3


As you are in a relationship, this is very tough to get out of it. But you should keep it in mind that this kind of relationship is not permitted by Islam. So, you have to try to validate it as early as possible.

In the mean time, tell her not to contact with you more. When you contact even over phone, you should keep it in mind that you are doing a haram work. You should save yourselves from this.

Brother, see, you both can enjoy as you want, but please, be patient until you get married. I understand that it is so tough after having in such relationship, but for the sake of Allah, pass your time to build up yourself instead.

You know, if Allah Subhanahu wa ta'ala wants, he could make your path easy to get married. On the other hand, if he does not, then your path would be very hard and tough. So, just control your emotion for this very short time. Make dua to Allah to be granted and repent to him for the past life. It is a continuous haram work you know!

So, in a word, my earnest request is both of you be patient until you get married and in the mean time beg Allah for a good relationship which would be granted to Allah as well as beg pardon for the past wrong doings.

May Allah grant all of us and our efforts.

Is it wrong in Islam to meet a boy or girl before marriage and holding hands and talking to each-other at phone?

Yes, it is.

  • 4
    Thanks for Answers I'll be patient until nikah inshaAllah and I'll also ask him to do so inshaAllah
    – Zaira khan
    Commented Apr 24, 2016 at 6:37
  • May Allah make it easy for you both Ameen.
    – Ahmed
    Commented Nov 12, 2016 at 9:23

Peace be upon you, In islamic rulings, a female cannot talk with a non-mahram (mahram is the one with whom you cannot marry such as your brother) except in need, and she must not keep her vioce soft. Similar applies to male. And he is a non-mahram. So, nikah will make that relation permisible. Therefore you cannot talk to him until you marry him.


Previous answers, seems good. You need to do your best to stop this kind of relationship till you get married.

But his parents are doing late in our nikah

This really sorry news to hear that parent doing late, many parapets do the same which is totally wrong. I'm providing the below video for both of you. And also, I would suggest that, you ask him to show this video to his parents. May Allah help all of us.

Check this video: [Crying] Don't Delay Marriage by Mufti Menk

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