Salam Brothers and Sisters.... I really don't know how to start off but I feel like my family from my moms side is cursed. No one is happy in there families. Everyone is sick. We suffer one lose after another. All our wealth seems to disappear. Cant get any where in life. We get married into families that seem good but turn out horrible. My husband constantly mentally abuses me. Everywhere we go, anything we touch, anything we do seems to back fire and so on. Were a religious and quite family, not your out going Disco Dancing family. My mother lived a horrible married life, all my 3 sisters and I the same. Along with all my uncles/aunties/ cousins from moms side. Can my family be cursed? Or what can I do?
Ali's response is sufficient. It is noteworthy to mention that in Islam the notion of family curse does not exist. The Quran says:
قُلْ أَغَيْرَ اللّهِ أَبْغِي رَبًّا وَهُوَ رَبُّ كُلِّ شَيْءٍ وَلاَ تَكْسِبُ كُلُّ نَفْسٍ إِلاَّ عَلَيْهَا وَلاَ تَزِرُ وَازِرَةٌ وِزْرَ أُخْرَى ثُمَّ إِلَى رَبِّكُم مَّرْجِعُكُمْ فَيُنَبِّئُكُم بِمَا كُنتُمْ فِيهِ تَخْتَلِفُونَ (Al Anaam 6:164)
"Say: "Am I, then, to seek a sustainer other than God, when He is the Sustainer of all things?" And whatever [wrong] any human being commits rests upon himself alone; and no bearer of burdens shall be made to bear another's burden.  And, in time, unto your Sustainer you all must return: and then He will make you. [truly] understand all that on which you were wont to differ. "
One has to face life with optimism, the mere fact that Allah has given us our 5 senses is such a gift. We are able to perform many great things if we act with the correct mindset. Every new day is an opportunity not to be missed.
Walekum Assalam Sister,
This question reminds me of the story of Prophet Ayub AS(Job) who was also afflicted by various calamities to the extent many people around him taught that it was because of his sins and that he was cursed.
The Prophet Ayyub (AS) exhibited patience and faith in Allah. He suffered from a number of calamities like loss to his wealth, loss in his family members in an accident , he him self got various skin diseases which made his appearance ugly and full of warts to the extent other people around him and assumed that it was because he was cursed by Allah and that this was the result of his sins. Yet he held fast to his faith in Allah. He neither grumbled nor became impatient and resort to wrongful means. He understood well that possessions and children were the gifts from Allah. If He had taken His things, it was useless to lament over their loss as it did not belong to him in the first place. When Prophet Ayyub (AS) was in an extremely pathetic condition he prayed:
"Truly adversity has afflicted me and You are Most Merciful of all who show mercy." (21: 83)
Allah responded to his prayer. The Holy Qur'an affirms:
"Then We heard his prayer and removed that adversity from which he suffered, and We gave him his household and the like thereof along with them, a mercy from Our store and remembrance for the worshippers." (21: 84)
His example and many similar examples from our prophet Muhammad (pbuh)'s life makes this point very clear: that those who remain patient under the stress of all circumstances never deprived of high rewards.
The Holy Qur'an affirms:
"And surely we try you with something of fear and hunger, and loss of wealth and crops, but give glad-tidings to the steadfast, who when a misfortune befalls them, say lo! we are Allah's (possession of Allah) and to Him shall we surely return. · Such are they on whom are blessings from their Lord, and mercy. Such are the rightly-guided." (2: 155-157)
Hence you would want to pray to and ask for Allah alone to help you with sincerity and full devotion to Islam and its Fard and Sunnah. In short, be steadfast, stay away from sin and all types of shirk. Sticking to true tawheed will ensure your akhirah.
Can my family be cursed? Or what can I do?
I don't believe in curses/possession/etc.. For that I will advise you to do the following:
- Always practice salah on time.
- Try to read Quran whenever you have free time
Always try to do the things that Allah loves and hope to keep the devil away from you:
Indeed, My servants - no authority will you have over them, except those who follow you of the deviators.[15:42]
Also have you considered the following:
Talking with a financial planner that can help you organize your money, spending and savings. Talking from experience, I myself used to waste a lot of money until I did to one, in which I started saving for my 401k, children future education and even have much of the money in savings.
Sickness can be explained by Doctors, try to get opinions from multiple doctors to what the sickness is and where it is coming from and how it can be solved. Additionally, you reading Quran should help elevate any sickness coming from Allah:
And We send down of the Qur'an that which is healing and mercy for the believers, but it does not increase the wrongdoers except in loss. [17:82]
Many times the choice in spouse isn't perfect. Alhumuduilah you have an option in Islam to get out of marriage if your Husband is abusive or you don't love him. Use that option and inshala you will find someone to suit you best. It is rarely common for a person to find the one, spouse, whom they can live with for the rest of their lives without bad things coming out.
Everyone suffers loss in family, you should keep patience and keep positive that you will meet them in the hereafter inshala.
I would advise against going to Swindlers and Charlatan who use the word of Allah as a way to make money in hopes to "cure" you.
Assalam-O-Alaikum! I am not going to quote examples from Prophet's live. I am going to be straight forward and want to tell you something really important. Your family is not following Allah's religion and book properly. Your mother was either not a good wife or a good mother. She never taught you the truth. Obey your husband's commands. Be a devoted wife no matter what happens. Always be loyal to him no matter what happens. Have full faith in him. I don't know about others but I guarantee you that your life will change with Allah's grace Inshaallah!