Salam I hope this finds you well. I have a question and hope you can provide and advice for me. My father and I were never close growing up I’ve always been the one to kind of force the relationship between us. It has come to a point where I don’t really care about our relationship as long as I’ve done my duties in Islam I’m good with it. Our relationship wasn’t only not there it became bad because he is terrible to my mom and I hear him insults her I’ve never seen him beat her but I’ve seen scars and broken things around the house.and he now he feels like I’ve sooo much resentment towards him that he feels I’m disrespectful towards and I can swear by Allah I’ve never done anything to hurt him purposely or disrespect and I try to keep my distance so I don’t give him chance to complain again but whenever I do that I get labeled as an ungrateful child because I don’t appreciate him being on earth, when I cry he calls me and yells whenever I try to do something to protect my self I get labeled as a bad person and he always use allah’s word to manipulate me into thinking I’m a bad person and I try my best to make both my parents happy so my question here is do I have to relate with my father without cutting ties?is it okay to have a relationship with him ne within a distance even is he complains or is it haram? And please I need advice on how to move on with my life without hurting him or myself
1 Answer
I had to put my father at a distance because he was always misbehaving and trying to provoke me to sin through angering me.
Remember, you must help your brother if he is wronged or a wrongdoer(by stopping him from injustice.) Your father has more right on you to stop him from his misbehavior than a brother in Islam.
So stop him, place a distance while also being patient when you do interact with him. Ihsan is in forgiving a person for their misdeeds to you (which is an optional, not required ihsan), it is also in stopping them from injustice.