Assalamu aleykum. I am 23 years old .I have been in a haram relationship with a married man for 3 years now. The truth is I couldn't end things with this man because I love him so much . I tried but I just couldn't . So the only way is for him to marry me.i have been ready since I met him . But the problem is him . It took 2 years just to come n introduce himself to my family. He promised me that he will marry me .but days are passing by n there is nothing more that he did .I want more but he keeps on delaying n giving me excuses. Wallahy I have reached a point I am drained n so frustrated . What should I do . Should I end the relationship for good n leave or have more sabr .

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    Sep 7, 2023 at 13:16

2 Answers 2


As salaamu alaykum, dear sister.

The reality of the matter is that you and this married man were engaged in adultery for 3 years, thereby incurring the wrath of Allah.

It is imperative that you make sincere Tawbah to Allah and seek his forgiveness, for this is a very serious offence.

Going forward, it is in your best interest to eradicate this relationship from your life and move on with your life.

Our Taqdeer is written by Allah, so it is foolish for us to seek out our destiny in haraam ways.

Be patient, make fervent dua, read quraan, make zikr, give sadaqah, establish extra rakaat of salaah and control your nafs.

We were never meant to enjoy this world and get everything that we desire; that is what Jannah is for.

Remember death frequently and all your problems will cease to have value.

May Allah grant you Hidaya and Affiyah.


Wa alaikum assalam. I'm sorry to hear about your situation, but it's important to address it from an Islamic perspective. What you're describing is a relationship that is not in accordance with Islamic principles, as you mentioned it's a haram relationship with a married man. In Islam, engaging in such relationships is not permissible, as it goes against the teachings of the Quran and the Sunnah.

Here are some steps you should consider taking:

Repentance (Tawbah): The first step is to sincerely repent to Allah for your involvement in this haram relationship. Recognize that what you've been engaged in is against Islamic principles, and seek forgiveness with a sincere heart.

End the Haram Relationship: It is crucial to end the haram relationship immediately. Continuing in a relationship that is not permissible in Islam will only lead to more sin and difficulties.

Reflect and Seek Guidance: Take some time to reflect on your choices and the situation. Seek guidance from knowledgeable and trustworthy individuals, such as an Islamic scholar, imam, or a trusted family member. They can provide advice tailored to your circumstances and help you understand the Islamic perspective on this matter.

Maintain Your Dignity: Understand that you deserve to be in a relationship that is based on respect, commitment, and Islamic principles. It is not acceptable for someone to use you in a haram relationship without a genuine intention to marry you.

Seek Marriage Legally: If you desire to get married, consider pursuing a legitimate marriage with someone who is both available and committed to building a halal relationship. This will provide you with the opportunity to live according to Islamic principles.

Practice Sabr and Trust in Allah: Ending any relationship can be emotionally challenging, especially when there are strong feelings involved. Seek patience (sabr) through prayer, supplication, and trust in Allah's wisdom and plan for your life. Allah knows what is best for you.

Remember that Allah is the Most Merciful and Forgiving, and He accepts the repentance of those who sincerely turn to Him. Seek His guidance and forgiveness, and take the necessary steps to rectify your situation according to Islamic principles. This may be difficult, but it is essential for your spiritual well-being and obedience to Allah's commands.

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