Saying something bad in private about parents?

Question

Sometimes my mom or dad say things to me or don't listen to me which hurts my feelings but I don't fight back because we are suppose to respect them.

Today my mom displaced something that was mine so I went to tell her to tell me next time if she wants to move something but she wasn't listening and changed the subject. This made me angry and I returned to my room and told myself 'uff annoying mom' (nobody heard me though). I regret saying that immediately. Will Allah punish me?

Another time my dad keeps laughing at me about how calm I am which makes everyone laugh at me. I always go into my room and cry because it affects my self-esteem. So I said 'ughhh why is dad so immature and stupid!' (nobody heard me). Will Allah punish me?

I don't want to make distance between me and them because I love them. So how do I calm down and not get angry about them? How can I get over anger and sadness when they tell me something that affects me? Do I need to repent everytime I say something bad about them in private? Or do I need to make ghusl? Is there something else I need to do?

Answer 1

Never should a question be "Will Allah punish me" because that is impossible for anyone to know but Allah Himself!

Someone could do the worst of crimes, yet Allah forgives Him.

Rather, the question should be "Is this action sinful," and the answer is yes.

Allah says:

When the two receivers receive, seated on the right and on the left.

Man does not utter any word except that with him is an observer prepared [to record]. (50:17-18)

The Prophet (SAW) said:

A believer is not a defamer nor a curser nor coarse nor obscene. (Tirmidhi)

Allah says:

And your Lord has decreed that you not worship except Him, and to parents, good treatment. Whether one or both of them reach old age [while] with you, say not to them [so much as], "uff," and do not repel them but speak to them a noble word. (17:23)

Whenever someone commits a sin, he should repent to Allah and seek forgiveness. Allah is always willing to forgive.

Whenever someone is in anger or wants to say something, it is recommended for them to replace it with zikr. For example, Allahu Akbar or Subhanallah.

If someone builds up this habit, even his statements while angry will become rewarded.

A man reported: I was riding on a mount behind the prophet (May peace be upon him). It stumbled. Thereupon I said: May the devil perish! He said: do not say; may the devil perish! For you say that, he will swell so much so that he will be like a house, and say: by my power. But say: in the name of Allah; for when you say that, he will diminish so much so that he will be like a fly. (Abu Dawud)