Hi my father has been verbally, physically and finically abusive towards my mother and also sometimes his children. I am now 25 and have a daughter of my own and live abroad. The two times I have visited my parents Homs I have found that the old cycle of abuse has not been broken. He still creates issues on the dinning table because the food is never to his taste, or on any other matter he can find. It really exhausts me because I don’t want my daughter to see this since it gave me anxiety and depression when I was a child. He doesn’t pray regularly so Islamic things don’t make sense to him. When I ask my father to stop he says I am disrespectful, know nothing because I’m his daughter and younger than him and continues to verbally abuse me and even say get out of the house to me and my daughter. My husband is mot in the country right now so I don’t have any where to go. My heart hurts for my younger siblings and mother who have to tolerate this man. I have lost all respect and love for my father and want to cut out any ties with him (I only call him from abroad he never does by the way) however I am worried that I am not being a good daughter. What do I do. I don’t want my mother to suffer anymore

1 Answer 1


Assalamu Alaikum,

Always always always, whenever you're in a problem, make dua'a to Allah and ask him for help. You can also say "Allahuma ajirnee fee museebati allahummakhlufni khairan minha," Or you can say "Qaddar Allahu wa mashaa'a fa3al" (where 3 represents the letter 3ayn) if you are in a problem that seems to have no solution. Also, when you said that your dad doesn't do Islamic acts, and you're sure he isn't Muslim or he's a hippocrate, then your mom has to divorce right away, since it's haram for a woman to be the wife of a non-Muslim. Whenever you're in trouble, always ask Allah for help. May Allah guide us to the right path.

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