Please guide me regarding obedience of parents. Most of the time, I harshly behave with my parents. There're several reason for that. Allah 'azzawajal gave me some sorts of true knowledge, among them the knowledge of true aqeedaa & true islamic knowledge and the obvious one is some knowledge of medical sector. Scenario 1/ if I want to obey my beloved prophet sallallahu 'alyhu wa-sallam in every aspects of my life such as keeping the beard, eating less, talking about death, reminding the hereafter/death specially at the time of illness/hardships etc. then there will be some indecent conversation I mean my mother don’t really happy with this, most of the time she agrees with that and tries to follow but sometimes she become angry and don’t want to acknowledge by that though what has mentioned to her is purely established and very much true. In that situation what I done is literally disobeyed her.

Scenario 2/ in my medical studies i've learnt that eating low amount of carbs really helpful to our body. And this is the main cause for several diseases. So I want to maintain it and suggest my parents to do so too. But they’re constantly ignoring and belittling this idea and argue with me mentioning that all the people around us is eating like Turkey, why should I eat like poor people¿ and they're following what other people tells them. In that particular situation I'm disobeying them because I've studied the consequences of eating too much carbs and I'm clearly seeing that they're wrong, must I obey them in that situation also though they're wrong? So, Please Don't skip this, check out these mentioned scenarios. What should I do? I'm really in need of guidance, I don’t want go astray. And please elaborate this issue with more information,Hadith,examples and advises.

1 Answer 1


Bismillah Hir Rahmaan Nir Raheem

As Salaamu 3laykum,

I hope you and your family are doing well.

As already answered by another person (@Muslim) that the main purpose of obedience is anything that is halal and permissible.

Scenario #1 Now I do want to state that we live in a world where there are variety of people with various backgrounds and upbringings. Each has their own point of view and thought process. It is not necessary that you lecture or talk about Islam all the times with your parents and friends. You find the right time and right place to have those discussions. And if they do not agree then back off and stay quiet. Visit the topic at another time and make dua for them in the meantime.

the Prophet (Peace Be Upon Him) said: "The Lord's (Glory Be To Him) pleasure is in the parent's pleasure, and the Lord's (Glory Be To Him) anger is in the parent's anger."(Hasan) Tirmidhi

With that in mind we have to be very careful on how we approach our parents. Not all parents will listen or some will listen to a certain extent. That is why giving dawah / spreading Islam is done with beauty (excellence), patience and wisdom.

Coming to scenario #2. I feel like scenario #2 is the same as scenario #1. If your parents do not agree with you then do not talk to them about your food choices. Low carb is not the only way to live a healthy lifestyle. They might opt for a higher carb diet but can exercise with good amount of protein to keep themselves healthy. Or they might be encorporating anti-oxidants , vegetables, etc. to stave off the harms of high carb eating. Whatever the case is we need to keep in mind the following hadith:

The best of' the deeds or deed is the (observance of) prayer at its proper time and kindness to the parents. (Sahih Muslim)

Overall the foundation is built on kindness , love , respect. Then you go forward with your message regarding health, Islam, etc. If they don't listen then it is up to them but you tried and do not give up trying. But of course with wisdom and patience.

Have a Nice Day!

Note #1: If you downvote my answer, please be courteous and say why you downvoted in a comment below.

Note #2: This is my own personal answer that I have derived from what I have researched.

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