So I want to know what Islam says about fathers hitting their daughters or adult daughters. Even when they lose temper because of their daughters, are they allowed to hit them or push them or throw them to the floor? Is it permissible for fathers to treat daughters of any age like this even if the daughters have done something wrong? What had our Prophet Muhammad (PBUH) and Islam said about it?
Short answer: not permissible, never. Here is a quick list of some of the instances when the Prophet (PBUH) spoke about daughters: https://aboutislam.net/shariah/hadith/hadith-collections/5-hadiths-girl-children/
Don't forget that Surah Al-Kawthar (108) was revealed in response to people's comments about the Prophet's (PBUH) daughter. If that does not highlight the importance of daughters and care that should be accorded to them, I don't know what does.
We also know from Islam that we can and should always apologise for any wrongdoing and seek forgiveness, and change our behaviour if we have done something wrong. One important thing to think about is what is in Islam vs. what is in certain cultures. Hope this helps.
In Islam, punishment is considered as a last resort if it has an educational effect, but if it reaches a point where the ransom becomes obligatory on him, for example, if he is beaten in such a way that his place is bruised, it is haram and it is not permissible. We must note that there is a difference between beating and punishment, and the two are not always necessary for each other. It is stated in a hadith from Imam Reza (AS) that a person complained about his son to that Imam and the Imam said:
"La tazraba wa ahjra walattal" [i]
That is, do not hit him, but be angry with him, but do not prolong your anger (for example, the father mediates and the child apologizes and promises not to do it again).
Therefore, punishment is the last resort, and of course, efforts should be made to minimize his negative effects. [i] Sea of Lights, vol. 101, p. 99
The Messenger of God, peace and blessings of God be upon him, said in a part of his advice to the Commander of the Faithful, Ali, peace be upon him:
There is retaliation for more than three blows. (4) Among the wills of the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) to Ali (as) was that he said: “Do not strike more than three times for discipline, because if you do so, you will be retaliated against on the Day of Judgment.” (5)
Physical immobility of children before the age of ten is not allowed and the amount of beating is quite limited, and if it is more than that, or leads to redness and bruising or disability, there is a penalty. But the father must be aware that if the child's body becomes red or bruised or injured as a result of the beating, he must certainly pay a ransom, even though the beating of the child was for no other purpose than to discipline.  The best solution that can be offered in this important and complex issue, and it is one of the educational lessons of Islam and the Ahl al-Bayt (as), is that you do not hit your children even if there is a need to punish them; They are the buds of Paradise that have sweetened life, so be angry with them at such times; Because this action has a great effect on the child's mood and the child feels that by forcing a parent on him, it is as if all the doors are closed on him and he has no choice but to give up his wrongdoings, so he tries to do the wrong things. Give up your ugliness and apologize to your parents or mentor, but it should not take too long to get angry, otherwise it will have other negative repercussions. Imam Musa ibn Ja'far (as) said to one of his companions who was annoyed and complained about his son:(11)
Do not hit him, but be angry with him, but it will not last long.
- The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said to the Commander of the Faithful: Varam Collection, p. 358.
- "Saying Abdullah's father in the literature of children and kings, he said: Five or five sets of it" Wasa'il al-Shi'ah, vol. 18, p. 581.
- On the authority of the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him), he immediately advised the Commanders of the Faithful: Varam Collection, p. 358.
- ر.ک. Sharia al-Islam, vol. 4, p. 192. (This issue is one of the jurisprudential assertions.
- Ada Da'i, p. 79.