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We have taken my wife brothers after her mom passed away. They make dua/prayer for his mom before eating on Thursday. I asked my wife of why do you guys do it and her answer was

we make dua so whatever is cooked/or we are eating. Allah give them a taste of it and in another version, I heard that the dua we make reach to the

I was shocked to hear that. As per my knowledge, a person who dies cannot know of this world and 3 things reach a deceased person

  1. A ceaseless charity
  2. Pious Children who makes du'a for him
  3. A beneficial knowledge

My concern is that my wife is so strong on her belief of what her elders use to do that it is like she won't leave doing it but as a husband how much I am liable for her action and what if she teaches same to our kids and it will go on?
What rights does a husband have to stop such bi'dah.

I have stopped eating on Thursday on the table because of the intention.

  • The questions you have asked are subjective, we are not a support group and do not provide personal counselling. – UmH Jun 12 at 15:34
  • @UmH the question is if Dead people can get taste of food and if it’s Bi’dah should one should remain in company of such ppl. There isn’t any subjective thing here. – Nofel Jun 14 at 11:50
  • Salam, I think your edition makes the given answer useless. This would mean that the effort given by the author is lost in vein. If you don't mind, I'd recommend you to roll back the edition and post your edition as a new question and refer to the older question. If a question gets closed it is not the end of the world. A bit off-topic: May I ask about to level of education of your wife? – Medi1Saif Jul 27 at 10:11
  • @Medi1Saif ws. more educated than me. I haven't read the Quran but she did when it comes to what their parents/grandparent use to do even it cannot be found and might be wrong, it is not gonna change. The issue is how much I can handle it n how will it come down to my generation e.g my recent post n I feel more pressured n wrong because of her siblings living with us and they agree with her which put me in bad position where I m main breed earner for ever1 n my kids. – Nofel Jul 27 at 10:39
  • The issue is to what extent you are responsible for her wrong doings. Further the issue is that this woman is your kids mom and therefore would have an influence on them and their education. The qur'an actually tells us that we shouldn't follow our parents if they do wrong... I was expecting either a stubborn follower of the elders tradition or an uneducated blind follower. – Medi1Saif Jul 27 at 11:40
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Once a soul separated from a person's body, the world will have no more value to the person and he will be alone for Allah. Same goes to your situation, where the person who dies will not taste your cooking.

This is considered as bi'dah and Saidatina 'A'isha reported Allah's Messenger ﷺ as saying:

"He who innovates things in our affairs for which there is no valid (reason) (commits sin) and these are to be rejected." -Sahih Muslim, Vol. 4, Book of Judicial Decisions, Hadith 4266

Therefore, you should fix this thinking based on correct Islam teachings. Make du'a for forgiveness instead for the dead and that Allah pours His blessings to them.

Wallahualam.

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  • Thanks. I have updated the question as there seem to be closed downvote but no reason – Nofel Jun 12 at 9:28

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