My family are not good people. They don't pay zakat and don't fast. My father doesn't let me fast. All the men in my family are domestic abusers. My uncle commits fraud. Everyone in my family lies, hurts others and gossips. They encourage all my cousins to do the same and never see the wrong of their ways. If I ever try to tell them they shout on me and don't talk to me. My father and brother are the same. I am 20 years old. My question is, will I be punished if I cut off ties or don't meet my family after I get married? I know Islam says to listen to your parents no matter what but I don't want to be around such people. They have brainwashed me to think they know better but I am now mature enough to see what they've been doing my whole life. They treat girls in the family very badly and a woman gets beaten up if she has a baby girl. They are everything islam is against. They have obviously taken care of me and raised me but like I said they are bad people. I dont want my children or husband to be around such people and want to keep my distance as much as possible. I respect them but dont want to be around them. Will I be punished for doing so? In my own opinion, I think it is better to be away from people spreading such negativity but since they are my family I dont know what my options are. And please understand that it is simply not possible to change them, I am the only one who thinks differently in my whole family and I am hated for it. What should I do?
May Allah keep you guided, certainly I would suggest you to keep your future family away from them since they're bad influence and I would do the same. Although, you should keep preaching your message to them let them know why you're away, keep in touch, send them gifts, but don't get very close. don't let your kids socialize in their environment because they will influence you kids whether you like it or not. Finally, if you know how the Moslem community rules towards those who don't do Fara'ed you'll have goosebumps it is very scary. The one who don't pray should not be talked to, should not be married to, should not be socialized with, I don't have my resources ready but I know this from preachers in khutbas.
I hope you all the best in your future,