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A Wife's Rebellion Against Her Husband is major sin 47 in al-Dhahabi's Major Sins (pdf). Generally, this is interpreted as meaning any sharia-compliant instruction:

Obedience is the first right that Islam acknowledges for the husband over his wife. She is required to obey him in everything unless he commands her to do an act of disobedience.
IslamWeb

Doing otherwise is being rebellious. Generally, there's an underlying assumption that the husband is being a reasonable Muslim, and he has his wife's best interests in mind.

If there's a foreseeable risk of some path leading to sin, then we're encouraged to avoid it. If a woman foresees becoming a rebellious wife, it seems like the woman should avoid getting married, but this goes against the sunnah.

Question: Should a woman avoid getting married out of fear of becoming a rebellious wife?

For example, a career woman could have her career destroyed (along with a lifetime of hard work) when her husband decides he wants her to focus on housework, cooking, and sex. Such a woman might refuse to sacrifice her life, thereby becoming rebellious.

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[4:97] Indeed, those whom the angels take [in death] while wronging themselves - [the angels] will say, "In what [condition] were you?" They will say, "We were oppressed in the land." The angels will say, "Was not the earth of Allah spacious [enough] for you to emigrate therein?" For those, their refuge is Hell - and evil it is as a destination.

[4:98] Except for the oppressed among men, women and children who cannot devise a plan nor are they directed to a way -

[4:99] For those it is expected that Allah will pardon them, and Allah is ever Pardoning and Forgiving.

--[An-Nisa' 97-99]--

Fundamentally, this isn't a question of marriage so much as a question of your willingness to submit to authority.

Marriage in Islam, like any other hierarchical institution, is as much about trust as it is about power and authority: If you don't trust someone to use their power appropriately, you probably shouldn't submit yourself to that authority if you have any way to avoid it. Same way you probably shouldn't work for an employer or live under a ruler who you fear may be abusive or who will make you do things you don't want to do.

So, should you marry a man who you fear may abuse his authority and who you don't trust to respect your needs and wishes as much as his own? I, and many people I know, would vehemently argue "No" but that's still ultimately up to you. However you choose, without that basic foundation of trust your marriage environment will probably just turn hostile, no matter if you act outwardly rebellious or bottle everything in.

And even if you do decide "No", does this mean you should never get married at all? That may end up being the case if you're unwilling or unable to trust anyone in this sort of position ever, but that suggests underlying trust issues which would probably negatively affect any marriage, Islamic or otherwise. But the earth of Allah is large — as is the number of marriage candidates in it — so there's really no excuse to just "make do" with someone when you know (or strongly suspect) you'll end up sinning as a result.

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    @G.Bach <comments deleted> Please refrain from using the site for preaching just because you don't agree with the premises of the post. – goldPseudo Mar 31 '18 at 6:26

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