I am in a serious relationship with a girl who lives in another country for 3 months. We want to get married, but I am not financially independent yet. It will take 1 to 2 years for me to become financially independent. I want to continue the relationship until we get married; we have seen each other in video chat many times.

Can we continue this relationship?

We are both Muslims of the same age, from the same country.

  • Comments are not for extended discussion; this conversation has been moved to chat.
    – goldPseudo
    Commented Mar 29, 2018 at 21:24
  • @goldPseudo . Is there a way to move a conversation to chat?
    – The Z
    Commented Mar 29, 2018 at 21:28
  • already moved to chat
    – user14815
    Commented Mar 29, 2018 at 21:32

1 Answer 1


Assalamu Alaikum - السلام عليكم

I request you be careful of this, brother. Stuff like this are not allowed in Islam as it represents those of the disbelievers. You should visit your local Shaykh or Imam as you probably can’t leave this state easily. In Islam, these kind of things start only after marriage. Allah created you the way he deemed you to be. Seek forgiveness from Allah for the acts you may have commited. As said in the Quran:

There is no sin on you if you hint as a proposal to the women, or conceal it in your hearts. Allah knows that you will make mention of them. But do not make a promise to them secretly, except that you speak in a recognized manner. Nor resolve upon a contract of marriage until the prescribed time is reached. Be assured that Allah knows what is in your hearts. So fear Him and be assured that Allah is Most-Forgiving, Forbearing. (2:235)

I recommend that you tell your parents about this to stop this secret act. There is no such thing as a girlfriend or boyfriend in Islam. It is forbidden to act like this. Unfortunately, as a result of the western community, people from the Ummah are getting lured into this practice. Those who did this practice have lost their faith. As I said, ask Allah for forgiveness. Remember, he knows what you are doing. To my understanding your situation sounds similar to this:

And those who cannot afford marriage should keep themselves chaste until Allah enriches them out of His grace... (24:33)

More advice:

Establish Salah at both ends of the day, and in the early hours of the night. Surely, good deeds erase bad deeds. That is a reminder for the mindful. (11:114)

  • Which is more sinful?--- (a) Eating haram food (eg: pork) ,,,,,,,,,,,, (b) Having haram relationship (long-distance relationship)
    – user14815
    Commented Mar 30, 2018 at 8:57
  • Equally if you recognize your mistake and you don’t care, even after that. I’ve heard many scholars say that if you know you’re doing a mistake and knowing that Allah is watching you and do not stop it will wash all your good deeds. Women or Paradise with women?
    – maounkhan
    Commented Mar 30, 2018 at 12:51

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