My father used to believe that if the couple gets back together within iddah, that talaq does not count and he has to give three more talaq to end the marriage. Due to this belief, he gave my mother talaq 5-6times but used to get back together within iddah period. He says he never had an intention to divorce her but always wanted to threaten her to make her follow his conditions. He recently found out that his belief was wrong and that he has given more than three talaqs and the divorce is done. He is now in doubt if he can ask Allah for forgiveness and remarry my mother? Will this marriage be valid? It is matter of life of kids, marriageable age girls and small boys. Both husband and wife really want to remarry and live together.
Obligation to divorce women when they are pure. Any divorce uterred when husband has established physical relations after menses will not be counted.
“O Prophet! When you divorce women, divorce them at their ‘Iddah (prescribed periods) and count (accurately) their ‘Iddah ” 65:1
What this means is when they are pure (not menstruating) and you have not had intercourse with them. This is what the scholars have said about divorcing them at their prescribed periods, they should be pure (not menstruating) and you should not have had intercourse with them, or they should be pregnant. This is what is meant by divorce at their prescribed periods. End quote from Fataawa al-Talaaq, p. 44
Fataawa al-Lajnah al-Daa’imah (20/58): There are several kinds of innovated divorce: where a man divorces his wife during her menses or nifaas, or during a time of purity when he has had intercourse with her. The correct view is that this does not count as a divorce.
If an individual is ignorant of a particular islamic ruling, he is not held guilty, Allah willing the couple is not divorced even once.
Ruling is applicable only when one becomes aware of it.
This man has to repent to Allah and ask his forgiveness.
Shaykh Ibn Baaz (may Allaah have mercy on him) was asked about a woman who has jewellery for adornment that stayed with her for years, then she came to know that it was obligatory for her to pay zakaah on it – did she have to pay zakaah for the past years? He replied: You have to pay zakaah from the time when you came to know that it is obligatory to pay zakaah on jewellery. As for the past when you did not know about that, it is not obligatory for you to pay zakaah, because the rulings of sharee’ah are only binding after one comes to know of them. Fatawa Islamiyyah 2/84
he was right with his previous opinion, except "he has to give three more talaq to end the marriage".
even saying 3 more talaqs within iddah does not make it counted as one of the three talaqs, but waiting iddah is required. he can say talaq 100 times in a hour and take her back, and even 1 talaq of the 3 is not counted. but he can say 1 talaq and wait iddah fully, bring witnesses, and then he become divorced, 1 talaq of the 3 is counted, and his ex-wife can take decision to go away from him and he cannot take her back without her agreement.