Assalamu Alaikum,
I am a 26 year old guy. I was engaged with a girl by our parents last year. I am still waiting for my marriage date but our situation is as described below.
I am working abroad and I am allowed to take only 12 days leave per year (at any time) which will expire if not taken within that year.
My father is also working abroad and he wants to conduct the marriage after his return. He can't come home without terminating his job. He can terminate it any time but he is not willing to leave his job due to our family's financial situation. [Note: I have 3 younger sisters. One will be marrying this month and the other two are studying in college. I can support them financially, Alhamdhulillah.
A few months after my engagement, I started talking with my fiance over the phone regularly,about once a week. We both love each other. We both want to be married as soon as possible. Her family is also waiting for my family's decision on the date.
I informed my father regarding my leave plan and requested him to come home. He refused to terminate his job and instructed me to wait nearly an additional year until we both secure our family's financial position.
I'm always thinking about her and living the life of my dreams with her. It is very difficult for me to wait any longer. So, I performed Istikharah prayer and got a result in my dream but I'm not satisfied as it showed me to wait 9 more months.
I can't sleep well and I am finding it very difficult in controlling my desires. I want to continue my life according to the Quran and the Sunnah. I feel marriage is a better solution to avoid sins and unwanted thoughts. So that, I can concentrate.
My questions:
- Is there a way to approach my parents requesting a earlier marriage without insulting them? (Note: I already spoke with them and they said I should wait about one more year)
- Is the result after Istikhara is final?
- Is there any amal, dua and Quran recitation for marrying sooner?
- What can I do to prevent inappropriate lustful thoughts?