So, I have met a woman who is a Muslim revert for the last 6 years Alhamdulillah. She is learning a lot. We have met a couple of times (in public, she has no wali as they passed away a long time ago) to get to know one another with all respect in place.

I decided to do an Istikihara - well, I asked someone who is more religious and more closer to Allah, who is a trusted Imam. The result came out as negative and I understand that this means Allah basically has something (inshallah) better for me and that this person is not suitable for marriage for me.

Whilst I understand it is better to not continue with this potential match, what generally will happen if you ignore the result of Istikihara? I know it would be rendered pointless in the first place but will Allah be displeased with you?

I know that the Imam has done it once and said a couple of days later that it came out negative. I do of course trust him but is this enough?

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    Have you done istikhara or the imam? How did you know the result was negative?
    – Medi1Saif
    Commented Aug 16, 2016 at 5:10
  • Istikhara is between You and Allah, not You and your Imam. Do it yourself...
    – mmushtaq
    Commented Aug 16, 2016 at 9:35

2 Answers 2


IMO this isn't an answer but a long comment on your Question as to answer it to the best of my knowledge I need more input:

  • You should let us know whom did Istikhara?
    As Istikhara can only be performed by the person whom wants help or guidance from Allah not by an intermediate you may find a link to a fatwa saying so (at least this is the strongest opinion) in my answer of this post: How to interprete a marriage a Non-muslim prayer Salaat Al-Istikhara? a knowledgeable Imam should know that it is the best if you do Istikhara yourself, as you are the person who needs guidance.
  • How did you know the answer was negative?
    Istikhara is asking Allah for guidance, as we don't know if anything we plan is according to Allah's plan for us, so by this we hope to find guidance that we chose the right plan which will be good for us so that we don't have to suffer because we went against Allah's plan or will!
    Usually if it was positive we would have a positive feeling about the matter we asked about if not it should be the opposite. Some people like to talk about a dream which reveals that this matter maybe a good thing, as we know that "true" dreams are a 1/46 (if i recall well) part of prophet-hood I'd like to compare this to happen to winning in a lottery ... I won't reject it in general, but you won't find any good and knowledgeable scholar pretending that a dream is necessary to give you guidance.
  • Now to your question: If you made Istikhara once you can re-do it, if the result somehow was negative that should mean that Allah had an other plan for you and this girl might seem to be a good match for now, but Allah knows what may come in future...
    Allah said in (2:216):

    But perhaps you hate a thing and it is good for you; and perhaps you love a thing and it is bad for you. And Allah Knows, while you know not.

    And in the context of marriage and relationship between spouses (4:19):

    For if you dislike them - perhaps you dislike a thing and Allah makes therein much good.

    So if you didn't consider following what is seemingly Allah's choice for you, you may find your future path either easier as Allah wanted it to be easy but maybe not for your good or harder not because you "rejected HIS choice for you" but because it was prescribed to be hard for your good (for example so that you can gain rewards). This is like if you stand at a crossroad but once you choose one path what will happen at the end was prescribed, but nobody knew it before.
    And Always have in mind the words of our Prophet:

    Strange are the ways of a believer for there is good in every affair of his and this is not the case with anyone else except in the case of a believer for if he has an occasion to feel delight, he thanks (God), thus there is a good for him in it, and if he gets into trouble and shows resignation (and endures it patiently), there is a good for him in it. sahih Muslim

    so you'll have always an opportunity to make things good for you by thanking Allah and being patient in any case!

  • Thank you! - it was an intermediate person who knows my family very well for 15+ years and is an imam. All I got was that the result was negative, that is all. Commented Aug 16, 2016 at 8:31
  • Thank you. The problem is, I cannot/do not know the prayer off by heart.... Commented Aug 16, 2016 at 9:39
  • @Ahmedilyas well you can write it down on a paper and perform it if necessary in your mother tongue (reading from the paper). It is a two rak'a nafl (sunnah) prayer and afterwards you sit down and make dua' according with a special wording IÄm sure you would find it if you search by tag istikhara.
    – Medi1Saif
    Commented Aug 16, 2016 at 9:46
  • Thank you so kindly. What is the Niyat (intention) to be said for the 2 rak'a nafl? (it's not part of the fard prayers...) Commented Aug 16, 2016 at 15:21
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    @Ahmedilyas IMO the intention is always in the heart saying or formulating it is not necessary (some consider it bid'ah, but if it helps you to concentrate do it), so your intention should be either to pray for istikhara or to offer two rak'a for the sake of Allah as this is an optional prayer. Before offereing the du'a you should praise Allah and send blessings and greetings to the Prophet (this is mustahab (recommended) when offering any dua' so this isn't something special for Istikhara).
    – Medi1Saif
    Commented Aug 17, 2016 at 5:44

So, if you have not thought about what seems to have been chosen by Allah for you, you can find your future path either easier, since Allah wanted it to be easy, but perhaps not for your own good or for the heaviness Because you "rejected his choice for you", but because it was prescribed to be firm for your good (for example, so that you could receive a reward). It's like if you're standing at an intersection, but once you choose one path, what happens at the end was prescribed, but no one knew this before.

And always keep in mind the words of our Prophet.

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