I am a 23-year old boy and doing a good job in capital of Pakistan. We are only 3 brothers, no sister (reason to tell is there no responsibility of her marriage). I am eldest of all, we are a upper-middle class family.

Different people have different kinds of minds, and to be honest I am desperate for marriage because it is my need. I can afford my marriage on my own but my parents do not allow it.

I never committed zina in my life, but at this stage of my life it seems I will do someday (may Allah prevent me). What does Islam says in such conditions?

If I commit zina, will I be sinful? And what about my parents? Will they be too?

  • 5
    If you commit Zina, it will be on you and you alone. Just get married without their permission if needed, it is not up to them.
    – user12537
    Commented Oct 26, 2015 at 20:12
  • @AmericanMuslim are there any evidences that I can get married without their permission?
    – Muslim
    Commented Oct 27, 2015 at 6:39
  • It is better to first convince your parents or someone who could make your parents agreed on your marriage realizing them that its not bearable for you to delay it anymore and you could take some other steps beacuse of that otherwise you have your second option
    – Syedah
    Commented Oct 27, 2015 at 13:21

2 Answers 2


Can a muslim man marry himself

First of all you should know that a Muslim man can marry himself without any waly even if his parents do not approve!

But he should choose the right woman as our Messenger (peace be upon him) told us how or which one to chose (see for example this hadith narrated by Jabir (May Allah be pleased with him) or this one narrated by Abu Hurraira (May Allah be pleased with him))-> a religious woman/girl.

Now assuming you did the right choice you are free to disobey your parents, but if you could chose any other woman/girl which your parents would accept this would be the best way! But in any case you should try to find out for which reasons your parents reject your marriage and try to explain your point of view! And as @servant wrote in his comment you should try to convince your parents either yourself or by mediation of a relative or friend who could convince them!

If your choice is bad the best would be to listen to your parents and look for an other girl/woman to marry which would be a good choice according the hadith mentioned above!

If I commit Zinna, will I be sinful? and what about my parents? will they be too?

Committing Zina is haram (as anything leading to it could be considered as haram) and it doesn't matter whether your parents haven't let you marry whom you want or not if you committed this sin it's on your responsibility (see in the Quran for example in Surat al Baqara (2:286):

It will have [the consequence of] what [good] it has gained, and it will bear [the consequence of] what [evil] it has earned.

or in Surat al Mudathir (74:38).

So Zina is not and should never be an option for a believer!

Finally here's a fatwa to make clear that you could marry yourself! And another one explaining that if you did a good choice and your parents refuse this would be a mistake on their side and some advice to prevent the big sin of zina!

And Allah knows best!

  • I think there is a hadith where Muhammad says that without a wali's consent, your marriage is null and void. I am not 100% sure. My memory is hazy. Commented Dec 1, 2019 at 11:46
  • 1
    @RitaGeraghty this applies for girls only.
    – Medi1Saif
    Commented Dec 1, 2019 at 11:47
  • @Medi1Safi, thank you. Commented Dec 1, 2019 at 11:58

You cannot commit zina, as it's strictly forbidden. However, it is your obligation to get married if you think you will fall in such a sin.

According to the Hanafi school of law, it is fard to get married when one is sure he will commit zina if he doesn't. It is wajib to get married if there is a possiblity that one might commit zina.

Source (Hanafi Website): http://m.sorularlaislamiyet.com/index.php?oku=184883

Your parents cannot prevent you from completing your Islamic obligations.

  • This really doesn't seem to do anything to answer the actual question asked. I would recommend you re-read the question carefully and edit this answer to focus it accordingly, or it risks being deleted.
    – goldPseudo
    Commented Jan 23, 2016 at 16:17
  • The time and circumcisions might not be right for him to marry, and so his parents postpone his wedding. He could wait a little longer, while he pursues his studies and saves up money before settling down. Consider motto: Marry in haste and repent at leisure. In other words, rush into marriage and regret later. Never marry poor, because money problems can start most heated arguments and impair relationship between husband and wife. Commented Dec 1, 2019 at 11:55
  • What is fard? And wajib? Commented Dec 1, 2019 at 11:56

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