Brothers and sisters I am a 14 year year old boy who is addicted to masturbation. Here is my story.
Ever since I was seven, I lied to my parents about praying. I hated the Quran and Allah (astaghfurullah) and I just wanted to do everything my way. About one year ago, I was introduced to a thing called masturbating. I used to do it 3-6 times a day. I broke my fast for all of ramadan just from masturbation. So if I want to repent I will have to fast 1800 days. With that I have swore a lie unintentionally maybe 50 times. 150 days extra I need to fast.
My current state: I pray 5 times a day, and remember Allah in almost everything I do. I try to get up for tahajud, but can't (even with multiple alarm clocks). I masturbate 1 time every 2 to 6 days. Its very hard to lower my gaze because I have to work at a gas station, and women really have no respect for themselves anymore in the US. So they're practically half naked. And how am I supposed to lower my gaze if I'm serving this person.
How can I stop masturbating? and what can I do all about those days I have to fast.
Please reply to me with kindness, may Allah be kind to you.