Wishing husband to be only mine in Jannah

Question

I am widow, I lost my husband 2 month before, he was suffering from cancer. We have twin 7 years boys.I love my husband and he loved me very much and I was his only one wife in his life. , he was good Muslim and he helped me how to be a good wife and good Muslim .I am young mother and widow, I don’t have anything except my boys and USA citizenship. I live in New York .I have to go long way to educate my 7 years boys ,i will do everything for them ,i don't have any helping hand here except Allah and it is enough for me .i love my husband and everyday i am trying to be good widow and good Muslimah ,it is hard as a single young mother ,but i am doing better everyday.

Question:

Is it possible for a good widow, if both of us go paradise, can I have my husband only for me, because I don't want my husband being shared with other paradise wives or huri( I heard everyman will get 2 wives in paradise.)

Please answer me.

Answer 1

I'm sorry for your lost but inspired by your strength and profound love towards Islam.

I can relate with how you feel about not wanting to share your husband in Jannah. I too once feel this way. My journey towards islam started abt 2 years ago, it was not smooth sailing but i learned that Allah swt is the best disposer of affairs. Trust him and he will take care of you. Have good thoughts about Allah swt, in every difficulty, there is ease. InsyaAllah.

I try to improve my understanding in islam via islamic conferences or readily shared views of ustadhs and mufti's (ustadh Nouman Ali Khan, Mufti Menk, Ustadha Yasmin Mogahed etc) in youtube. In my search for knowledge, i found that in Jannah, everything is good. There is no ill feelings towards each other, unlike in earth. The pious men and women are promised only everlasting happiness. No more sorrow and pain. No more lost and confusion. The fear you're feeling now, will not be felt in Jannah. Take heart, that you would only feel love and more love. How awesome is that? :)

Its hard to imagine it now; our human brain is limited, so trust in Allah swt. He never breaks his promises. Focus on getting into Jannah and everything else, leave it to Allah Swt. Tawakkal my dear sister.

Sending you much love and doa for your well being and for your kids. May Allah swt help us to be firm and steadfast on the straight path. Ameen.

Answer 2

We're not given the exact picture of how we get to choose our partners there in Jannah.

Note: Since, no exact answer is provided to us, we can only make deductions, that may or may not be 100% correct. Because, we don't know what will happen then in the hereafter, and what ever is going to happen, will happen as the creator wishes, hence beyond our scope. But all we can do is make educated guesses.

1. People of Jannah will have free will.

They will have therein fruits (of all kinds) and all that they ask for. (Qur'an 36:57)

2. But not complete free will.

Then (there will be) the Companions of the Right Hand;- What will be the Companions of the Right Hand? And the Companions of the Left Hand,- what will be the Companions of the Left Hand? And those Foremost (in Faith) will be Foremost (in the Hereafter). These will be those Nearest to Allah. (Qur'an 56:8-11)

These verses are talking about division of people into 3 groups, those who go to hell(left), those who go to 2nd class paradise(right) and 1st class paradise(foremost).

Some deluxe facilities are provided to the 1st class people, but not to 2nd class as the rest of the Surah explains. So what if the 2nd class people ask for those features in the 1st class?(based on my 1st point i.e. Qur'an 36:57). Well again we can't for sure say that they won't be granted, but our common sense says that they won't be granted. So, how is it contradicting?

Well, to prove that, the 2nd class guys don't at all ask those features of those of the 1st class. Hence, no contradiction.

Now, your question,

can I have my husband only for me, because I don't want my husband being shared with other paradise wives or Houri.

Now, you want your husband to not have other wives, but what if your husband wants other wives there? Allah, will have to grant both their wishes right? But, how both are contradicting?

So, to resolve, either you won't have those feelings of jealousy there in paradise(if you make it up to there) as you have today in this worldly life if at all your husband gets to have other wives(Houri), I mean you won't ask for that wish up there.... (or) you will be that Houri(only) for your husband created a fresh with wide lovely eyes. (Based on Qur'an 56:35-36, because the translations vary widely, and literally it is "Indeed, We [We] have produced them (into) a creation", so we're not sure if they're separately created along side original wife or the wife is created anew as virgin with wide eyes, imagine, if the wife today is darker in color, then what? No where does it explicitly say that a person will have more than one partner).

So we can make only guesses of what will happen there and this is left as a suspense for the believers to find out that in the hereafter.

May the creator guide us all.

Answer 3

Sister, firstly, it is not wrong that loving someone else again, or marrying again. We are humans, we have emotions, we have needs. You may decide that your children may need a good father, or you need a good husband. This is not wrong. Also far more acceptable than going through a sin.

Secondly, the life in the heaven won't be exactly the same as in the earth. There won't be any trouble, or pain, or sadness etc. All people there will be happy. This is the promise of Allah for Muslims. But there are people who want contradicting things with each other. For example you may want to be with your children, but they may not want to be with you, rather they may want to be with their spouses. How would that be?

Actually I don't know. But I know that there won't be any sadness there. Also all of our wishes will be met. Maybe we want such things because we are selfish now and we won't wish them in heaven, maybe it is our right to wish such things and it will be met. How is Allah's problem. He can easily find a solution to such things. Maybe you will be your husband at the same time he will be someone else, but you won't know. Maybe it is possible in heaven that he will be with her and he won't be with her at the same time. We can't know. But we can sure about that, there will be no sadness there and all of our wishes will be met, because Allah made a promise to us.

Answer 4

الَّذِينَ آمَنُوا بِآيَاتِنَا وَكَانُوا مُسْلِمِينَ (69) ادْخُلُوا الْجَنَّةَ أَنْتُمْ وَأَزْوَاجُكُمْ تُحْبَرُونَ (70) Allah Reveals it in Qura'n (الزخرف ٦٩، ٧٠).The Versus Means [[You] who believed in Our verses and were Muslims.(69)Enter Paradise, you and your kinds, delighted.(70)], Second Versus which generally just means that Those who were Muslims and those who believe in Qura'n they will enter paradise with their kinds.(which includes wife and husband). According to your question their is a story related Which happen in the time of Muawiat(RA). "when the(أبو الدرداء رضي الله عنه), Husband of أم الدرداء is dead, Muawiat (RA) went to أم الدرداء for a marriage. She denies saying that she heard that her husband أبو الدرداء was telling that Muhammad (SAW) told that if the wife who husband is dead, if she had another marriage she will get her last husband in paradise.[ ((المرأة لآخر أزواجها)) [السلسلة الصحيحة، 3، 275]. Therefore أم الدرداء had no marriage and wait for her husband with the will of meeting her husband (أبو الدرداء) in paradise. According to Hadith Allah will give first husband in paradise if she waits for him patiently, without another marriage,and if you have another marriage you will get last husband you married.There is no one without marriage in paradise, related to this prophet Muhammad (SAW) said "[(وَمَا فِي الْجَنَّةِ أَعْزَبُ)) [مسلم، 13، 467] " There will be no one without marriage in paradise". Allah will give those who enter alone in paradise the husbands or wives whom they like, Allah knows best what we like.[والله أعلم]