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My husband divorced me during menses 11 years ago. He uttered the divorce words three times in one meeting, then I went back to my parents house. After 2 weeks, a group of ladies from my family went to my in-laws house for patch up, but in front of them my husband again repeated the divorce words three times. Actually when my husband divorced me the first time, I was in menses, but next 4 months I got no menses (may be due to feeding my son or due to tension). Then after 16 months, he sent me the divorce papers (divorce in written form).

Now he wants to do Nikkah with me again. Can you please tell me that is it possible?

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In the name of Allah, the most compassionate, the most merciful

Initially let’s see what is considered as 3Talaqah (3-divorced) from the view of Shia. Apparently, from the viewpoint of Shiite, 3-Talaqah ought to be performed in three separated times. Actually it doesn’t mean that it would be happened if you repeat it 3 times.

Anyhow, on the whole, according to Shia:

If a man divorced his wife 3 times (with its conditions), that woman would be Haram on him. And the is a condition that they be Halal to each other, and that is related to this matter that the woman gets married to another man, and divorce him after intercourse. Afterwards they would be Halal to each other again.

Reference:

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Yes, you can marry. You have divorced only once yet. (In part which is written here).

See my explanation at Just reciting "Talak" thrice commits divorce? .

I think, just saying "talaq" is not counted as one divorce, only saying and waiting iddah is counted as one divorce. You made that 1 time, so, you are divorced one time. Only when you remarry, then again divorce, with iddah, 2nd divorce is counted.

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Divorce in Islam is actually quite complicated. Many hadiths say one thing while other says something else, esp. regarding triple divorce (three divorces uttered at once). Some say they count as one divorce. They say this was the rule during Prophet Muhammad last era as well Abu Bakr and Umar (RA) era. In short this was a problem among Muslims. Umar (RA) was strictly against triple divorce. For the right reason that triple divorce ends the marriage altogether and ends any reconciliation efforts between the couple. There is simply no taking back. That's probably the reason they reformed it so that triple divorces counts as single divorce.

Some Clarification about Talaq

Recommend way of Talaq is, one occurrence at a time. Then one has to wait for the women Iddath period. If the husband reconciled with his wife and want to take her back, he can! His wife will does not count. He can do so by having sexual intercourse with her or may be some foreplay. No need to remarry her again or bring any witnesses!

If the period of iddath (usually three months) has passed, he has to offer her marriage proposal again and she may accept/reject. A new mahar will be decided in this case and the marriage has to be proper. This is true in case of one or two divorces.

Three Divorces

If three divorces have taken place, the man cannot take his wife back, although some say he still can within her Iddath period.

Your Particular Case

  1. Divorce has taken place when he issued it during menses. This divorce counts. Let me be on reformed version. That divorce counts as one divorce.

  2. Divorce agains took place when you heard about it from your relative (reliable witness). Although he said it thrice, let’s count it as second divorce only.

  3. Divorce took place for the third time when he sent you divorce papers. That means all three divorces have taken place. Reference

Going back to your previous husband

It is not permissible to remarry your ex-husband unless you have married someone else. Your second marriage must be a valid marriage and NOT for the purpose of halala. Your second husband must divorce you with his own free will in order for you to marry your first husband. If it is already been decided, he will consummate and divorce you, it is counted as sin.

My personnel View

I by no means am trying to stop you from marrying your ex-husband because of religion reasons. May be there is a point that you have left in the question that an Aalim can take advantage of and will allow you to re-marry him. Perhaps you can talk to a local Imam for that matter. I wish you all the best!

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