Is attending a school prom or formal event held under strict conditions forbidden?

Question

I am a female Muslim and a senior this year. Yesterday was our school prom and I decided to go. I still wore my Hijab and none of my skin was showing. Even though they allowed me to go, my parents have been bothering me about this ever since I came back, telling me that it isn't allowed in Islam. I just don't really understand why it would be, I mean, under certain circumstances, it could be forbidden.

There were no drugs or alcohol at the prom. It was a very formal event, with no inappropriate dancing or music involved. Before being allowed to enter, we had to have our purses searched to ensure that nothing inappropriate was being brought. I also didn't hang out with any of the boys, I went with a few of my girl friends, and only danced with them. Guys did not sit at our table either. Also, not only was our school principal there, but the principals of the 9th, 10th, 11th, and 12th grade classes were there too (we have a big school). On top of that, a bunch of teachers were also there, and even a few parents.

So if there was no inappropriate dancing, music, drugs, alcohol, or even guys involved during my night, what was really wrong about it? I still covered up as well.

Answer 1

Bismillah.

I'm going to give you my honest opinion on the matter, but I have no hadiths to support my answer as I don't think this issue was raised during the life of the Prophet (PBUH). Also, I am sure you will get a lot of different answers, because this might be a very opinionated question with varying views from different scholars.

First of all, in my opinion, I don't think it was haram with you going to prom. I would have said that it was a sin if there was any alcohol present, but since you made it explicitly clear that there wasn't any, I don't think going was a sin. Now, I'm not a scholar by any means, but from my experience, I've witnessed similar events. For example, there are weddings in the Arab world that are very prom like, in that there is a room with women and men mixed. Again, I reiterate the importance of nothing sinful, such as alcohol or drugs, being present. Having said that however, I feel like it might not be mustahab (encouraged) to go to such event, since you never know what might happen (i.e, boys can start to act very close to girls for example).

I must say though, had your parents not wanted you to go from the beginning, I wouldn't have. This often happens to girls, especially those of your age and in the Western world, who don't understand why their parents might not let them "go out" to proms and events of such, but respecting their wish is more important. In my opinion, I would believe that your parents wouldn't want you to go because people might behave inappropriately, such has boys dancing with girls, which is obviously a sin. Therefore, putting oneself around these environments, even if one is not participating, is not encouraged, and could be border line a sin. I readdress, it is not the fact of you not doing any inappropriate actions, as I'm sure your parents trust you, but it is more the Western kids in which your parents would not trust. Therefore, it is best to stay clear of such a surrounding.

This is, again, my honest opinion, and as I have dealt with some of the same issues before in my life, why I would understand if your parents didn't want to let you go to the prom.

Answer 2

This article explains why it is haram to go to a school dance or prom

https://farhatamin.com/prom-night-is-it-really-ok-for-muslims-to-go-to-prom/

Answer 3

Proms are haram in Islam because allah wrote whoever spends the night with boys is going to hell no asking for forgiveness s allowed