I am married to a wonderful man living in the UK to make a living for his family. He has a daughter from a previous marriage and has full custody. For diverse circumstances the little girl must live in his parents household in Pakistan where she is being well taken care of. As the distance is so far, he can only visit her once a year.

My husband has gone through so much turmoil with his previous marriage and at the moment is not able to have me with him neither emotionally nor financially.

I am currently at my parents home in America for the holidays, also came to renovate my foreign visas.

My question is regarding my duties towards his child: Should I be with my husband, or should I take care of his child in another country and for how long?

In other words, who should I be more dutiful towards, my husband that lives in the UK or his child that lives in Pakistan?

  • If the girl is being well taken care of with her grand parents, why do you think it is your duty to live with her in Pakistan?
    – Tarek
    Aug 16, 2014 at 23:20

2 Answers 2


Your first duty is to your husband. If the child were in the UK, it would be your duty to look after his daughter as if your own. From afar, you can make sure the child is financially helped for her education and upkeep and is not a burden to grand parents. Make sure you talk to the child regularly. It is your duty (both).


The significant matter which you ought to pay attention is that he is considered as your husband if he has not divorced you. Accordingly there must be some duties that you ought to do them as being his wife.

On the other hand, you shall consider his daughter as your daughter anyhow. So the finest way could be having a nice life altogether and also try to instruct or train his daughter as your daughter. Good luck. God willing, Allah would help you for your good intention (according to the mentioned issue).

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