Does the Quran allow husbands punish their wives?

Question

Is there any Ayah in the Quran which allows husbands punish their wives because of disobedience?

Answer 1

Yes, there is. The ayah in the Quran says:

Men are in charge of women by [right of] what Allah has given one over the other and what they spend [for maintenance] from their wealth. So righteous women are devoutly obedient, guarding in [the husband's] absence what Allah would have them guard. But those [wives] from whom you fear arrogance - [first] advise them; [then if they persist], forsake them in bed; and [finally], strike them. But if they obey you [once more], seek no means against them. Indeed, Allah is ever Exalted and Grand.

الرِّجَالُ قَوَّامُونَ عَلَى النِّسَاءِ بِمَا فَضَّلَ اللَّهُ بَعْضَهُمْ عَلَىٰ بَعْضٍ وَبِمَا أَنفَقُوا مِنْ أَمْوَالِهِمْ ۚ فَالصَّالِحَاتُ قَانِتَاتٌ حَافِظَاتٌ لِّلْغَيْبِ بِمَا حَفِظَ اللَّهُ ۚ وَاللَّاتِي تَخَافُونَ نُشُوزَهُنَّ فَعِظُوهُنَّ وَاهْجُرُوهُنَّ فِي الْمَضَاجِعِ وَاضْرِبُوهُنَّ ۖ فَإِنْ أَطَعْنَكُمْ فَلَا تَبْغُوا عَلَيْهِنَّ سَبِيلًا ۗ إِنَّ اللَّهَ كَانَ عَلِيًّا كَبِيرًا

Quran 4/34

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And before you jump to any concluion. You need to know about these limitations:

Q1/ when are we allowed to beat them ?

But those [wives] from whom you fear arrogance.

Q2/ Is there another solution ?

Actually, yes. There are 2 other solutions before reaching this level. The 1st soltuion in the verse says:

[first] advise them;

the 2nd solution,

[then if they persist], forsake them in bed"**

If the problem still persists and instead of divorce, the husband may resort to another measure that may save the marriage, at least in some cases. Then he would use the last solution.

Note: You must note that you are not allowed to jump to the 3rd solution(beating your wife) directly. You use the 3rd solution only when you have tried the 2 solutions above.

strike them

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What kind of beating ?

Islam has specific guidelines that a Muslim must follow if he wants to beat his wife.

1st of all, It must be a light striking. Ibn Abbas, The most famous interpreter of the Quran, when asked about this verse and the way to beat the wife, he answered:

You beat them with a Miswak

Miswak is a thin rod [Picture here] that Arabs used to use to clean their teeth. Much like a tooth brush. By choosing the miswak as a tool,Ibn Abbas is telling us that beating should not cause any bodily harm, or even be harsh.

Another limitation is that we are not allowed to beat the face of an animal.In the hadith of the prophet:

Jabir reported that Allah's Messenger (PBUH) forbade (the animals to be beaten) on the face or cauterisation on the face.

Muslim

If it is forbidden to beat an animal on the face. Then by default you are not allowed to beat a muslim(male/female) on the face.

Also, Allah has asked us in the Quran to be patient with our wives:

In the Quran:

O you who have believed, it is not lawful for you to inherit women by compulsion. And do not make difficulties for them in order to take [back] part of what you gave them unless they commit a clear immorality. And live with them in kindness. For if you dislike them - perhaps you dislike a thing and Allah makes therein much good.

An-Nisa - 19

Not to mention the tens of verses that asks us to be patient. We should not ignore all these verses and attack our wives directly.

Furthermore the prophet didn't ever hit his wives or any slave. When you read his life he would always solve the problems without resorting to beating them. He even said those who don't beat their wives are the best of men. In the hadith:

In the Sunnah:

Do not beat the female servants of Allaah;" "Some (women) visited my family complaining about their husbands (beating them). These (husbands) are not the best of you;" and also, "[It is a shame that] one of you beats his wife like [an unscrupulous person] beats a slave and maybe he sleeps with her at the end of the day."

[Riyadh Al-Saaliheen]

and in another hadith, Nu’man ibn Basheer reported:

Abu Bakr came seeking permission to enter upon the Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him, and he heard Aisha raising her voice over the Messenger of Allah. He entered and said, “O daughter of Umm Ruman! Are you raising your voice over the Messenger of Allah?” So the Prophet stood between them and when Abu Bakr left, he said to her, “Do you see how I saved you from him?” Then Abu Bakr again sought permission to enter upon the Prophet and he heard them both laughing. He entered and said, “O Messenger of Allah, allow me to share in your peace just as you have allowed me to share in your conflict.”

Source: Musnad Ahmad 17927

And as a Muslim we should imitate the characteristics and follow the life of the prophet Mohamed (PBUH). The quran says:

Say, [O Muhammad], "If you should love Allah , then follow me, [so] Allah will love you and forgive you your sins. And Allah is Forgiving and Merciful."

http://quran.com/3/31

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But why does the Quran say we should beat them while the prophet didn't raise his hands over any women ?

To answer this question you should know that Islamic teachings are universal in nature. They respond to the needs and circumstances of diverse times, cultures and circumstances. Some measures may work in some cases and cultures or with certain persons but may not be effective in others. By definition, a "permissible" act is neither required, encouraged nor forbidden. So may be beating the wife would in some cultures would actually help the relationship between the husband and the wife.